Parenting Resources
 

List of National & Local LGBT Organizations

Regrettably, no single source exists of a particular state’s laws, policies, and family court rulings parenting by LGBT people. The resources below are a good place to start your research but cannot provide the comprehensive accurate, up-to-date legal information in your state or county.

How Many Gay Parents Are There?
Adoption/Foster Care Resources
Adoption/Foster Care/Custody Laws
Publications - General
Publications - For Children
Publications - For Parents
Publications - Parenting Magazines
Video
Conferences & Camps

How Many LGBT Parents Are There?

We don't know exactly how many LGBT parents are raising children in the U.S., just as we don't know how many people are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender. Some human sexuality studies have found that 10% of people are LGBT; others, counting only those who self-identify, put the number at 3 to 4% of the population.

Numerous social scientists have developed estimates of how many LGBT parents there are by using one well-known population study (National Health and Social Life Survey, E.O. Lauman, 1995.):

• 1 to 9 million children are being raised by gay parents, based on those estimates. This means that somewhere between 1 to 12% of all children are being raised by a gay parent. (The lower figures represent the more narrow definition of who is gay."Coparent or Second-Parent Adoption by Same-Sex Parents," American Academy of Pediatrics, February 2002)

And there are a couple other important statistics:

• 8% of self-identified gay, lesbian, or bisexual people are parents or legal guardians of a child under 18 who lived in their home. (Kaiser Family Foundation national study of 405 randomly selected, self-identified lesbians, gays, and bisexuals in fall of 2000)
  
• 49% of gay people would like to have children of their own someday. (according to the same Kaiser Family Foundation study)

Adoption/Foster Care Resources [top]

AFCARS Report, the federal statistics on adoption and foster care
Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute
Familyhelper Gay-Friendly Adoption Listings
Family Pride Coalition
GLAD: Parents & Kids
Human Rights Campaign - FamilyNet
Lambda Legal
NAIC State Adoption Directory
National Adoption Information Clearinghouse
National Directory of Children, Youth, and Family Services
OurWorldToo Gay-Friendly Adoption Listings
Proud Parenting
Transparentcy
Williams Project, UCLA

Adoption/Foster Care/Custody Laws [top]

Human Rights Campaign
The TaskForce

Publications - General

The Gay and Lesbian Atlas
Gary J. Gates and Jason Ost

Drawing on the most recent data from the U.S. Census, this groundbreaking work offers a detailed geographic and demographic portrait of gay and lesbian families in all 50 states plus the top 25 U.S. metropolitan areas.

Families of Value: Personal Profiles of Pioneering Lesbian and Gay Parents
Robert A. Bernstein

Families of Value offers a poignant defense of families with same-sex parents who are at the forefront of social change in America. These stories portray the resistance that passionate and dedicated parents face while raising healthy and well-adjusted children.

Protecting Families: Standard for Child Custody in Same-Sex Relationships

This publication puts vital information in the hands of families not defined solely by biology, adoption, or marriage who are at risk by a legal system that does not provide a mechanism for protecting their relationships at times of crisis. The recommendations and practical tools help parents maintain the relationships with their children at times of crisis or breakup.

Too High A Price: The Case Against Restricting Gay Parenting
By Eric Ferrero, Joshua Freker, and Travis Foster

The landmark book describes the consensus among child welfare experts that making adoption placement decisions or custody determinations based on a parent’s sexual orientation is bad for kids, summarizes the scientific studies confirming that the children of LGBT people are as happy and well-adjusted as others, and explains why the limits on parenting by LGBT people violate the Constitution.

Publications – For Parents [top]

Conceiving Parenthood: Parenting and the Rights of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender People and their Children - A Report of the International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission
By Leslie Ann Minot; edited by Scott Long

An in-depth report on the disparity between the pursuit of equal rights for LGBT families and the reality in which they live. LGBT families suffer unique difficulties due to the lack of laws that recognize their relationships.

Considering Parenthood
By Cheri Pies

A warm, straightforward, well-informed book designed to anyone considering having children. Examines all of the issues a parent must face and allows all people, regardless of sexuality, gender, or cultural background, to relate.

Families of Value: Gay and Lesbian Parents and their Children Speak Out
By Jane Drucker, Ph.D.

This book contains personal accounts from LGBT families from all walks of life, told in their own voices, about the joys and struggles of parenthood. The stories featured in this book serve as testament to the strength of family, no matter what their background or make-up might be.

The Final Closet: The Gay Parents Guide For Coming Out To Their Children
By Rip Corley

Psychotherapist Corley addresses the growing number of LGBT parents and families, assisting them in the struggles that come with being part of a non-traditional family.

Gay Parents/Straight Schools: Building Communication and Trust
By Virginia Casper and Steven B. Schultz

This book thoroughly examines and addresses the educational needs and wants of LGBT families. It explores why homosexuality is perceived as such a threat, especially in regards to the education of children, when in actuality it has the potential to enrich the worldviews of both children and adults. Featuring perspectives from students, teachers, administrators, and LGBT families, this book provides concrete information and useful strategies to ensure that all children receive a well-rounded, all-encompassing education.

Getting Simon: Two Gay Doctors' Journey To Fatherhood
By Kenneth B. Morgen

Getting Simon illustrates the joys and difficulties of gay parenting through the real story of two gay dads.

Lesbian and Gay Families: Redefining Parenting in America
By Jill S. Pollack

This book examines the question of what constitutes a family and who has the "right" to be a parent. LGBT families are visibly increasing, fueling a debate of what a family should look like, and what is "healthy" or "unhealthy" for children.

The Lesbian & Gay Parenting Handbook: Creating and Raising Our Families
By April Martin, Ph.D.

With just the right mix of personal wisdom and keen advice, the book guides lesbians and gay men on how to build the kind of support network that all parents need.

Love Makes a Family: Portraits of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Parents and Their Families
By Gigi Kaeser

Family Diversity Project's photo-text book about families in which the parents are lesbians, gay men, or transgendered people, and the children are either offspring of one of the parents or adopted or foster children of one or both parents. Adding further diversity are biracial couples; parents and children of different races; children with impairments; and families that include nonresident members. The book complements a traveling exhibition that comes in two versions: one for elementary school students, the other for teenagers and adults.

Reinventing the Family: The Emerging Story of Lesbian and Gay Parents
By Laura Benkov, Ph.D.

This book is the first in-depth analysis of the joys, challenges, and issues facing LGBT individuals who have chosen to raise children. It examines custody battles, legal developments in adoption and foster care, pregnancy, parental roles, and homophobia.

Publications – For Children [top]

Daddy's Roommate
By Michael Willhoite

This book depicts the experience of a young boy whose father is gay. His friends and family are caring, understanding, and open-minded.

Daddy's Wedding
By Michael Willhoite

A follow-up to Daddy's Roommate. A fun, vivid description of companionship, love, and family.

Heather Has Two Mommies
By Leslea Newman

One of the first books written for children on the topic of LGBT families, this book is enjoyable, straightforward, and comforting. It shows that all families are unique, and all are special. Heather is a small child learning an invaluable lesson, one that will help her and all children like her.

Uncle What-Is-It Is Coming To Visit
By Michael Willhoite

This children's story depicts the stereotypes and pre-conceived notions that can hurt individuals as well as families.

Who's In A Family: The People Who Love You The Most
By Robert Skutch (for ages 3-6)

In text and illustrations, this book examines diverse types of families through comparisons between humans and animals. Very simply, it allows a child to see all the different types of families that exist, and how all families are unique and should be valued.

Zack's Story: Growing Up With Same-Sex Parents
By Keith Elliot Greenberg (for ages 6-14)
This story describes the life of Zack, an 11 year-old boy with a lesbian mom.

Publications – Parenting Magazines

Gay Parent Magazine
Proud Parenting

Video [top]

Both of My Moms' Names Are Judy
This powerful video presents elementary school children talking about their families and their experience with homophobia. Prepared as an introduction to an anti-homophobia workshop for teachers, administrators, and parents, the video comes complete with a workshop manual.

Our House
This one-hour documentary is a frank, insightful exploration of what it means to grow up with gay or lesbian parents. It profiles the sons and daughters—ages five to twenty-three years old—in five diverse families who are facing the usual highs and lows of growing up, developing their own feelings about their parents' sexuality, and encountering a wide variety of reactions from relatives, classmates, teachers, and neighbors. (See www.colage.org/documentary.)

That's a Family
The first film in the "Respect for All" series is a highly entertaining half-hour documentary designed for elementary school children to see and understand many of the different shapes that families today take.

More resources are available from the Family Pride Coalition.

Conferences & Camps [top]

CONFERENCES

Family Pride
Carla Danley
PO Box 65327
Washington, DC 20035
202.331.5015
carla.danley@familypride.org

Lesbian and Gay Family Building Conference
LGFBP
124 Front Street
Binghamton, NY 13905
607.724.4308
lesgayfambldg@aol.com

Rainbow Families Conference
Marcy Rede or
Deborah Talen
711 West Lake Street, 210
Minneapolis, MN 55408
612.827.7731
marcy@rainbowfamilies.org

[top]